Pride Comes Before the Fall. Literally.

As many of you probably know, I tore my ACL while skiing in February.

 

What most of you likely don't know is that this happened approximately 5 weeks after I declared 2014 as "The Year of the Suz."

Similar to "The Summer of George," but more awesome.

This was going to be the year.

Weight Loss: The year I got the last 20 pounds off from my first child.  I mean, I have a closet of what I consider to be seriously cute clothes.  None of which I can squeeze a calf into, much less my thunder thighs OR my rear end.

 

(I seriously need access to these suits.  Like, for my job and stuff.)

Organization: The year that I got organized.  I even bought myself the organization tool: The Emily Ley Simplified  Life Binder. Or at least that's what I was convinced of after spending hours researching how to get organized.

It's cute. It's organized.  There are tabs. There are To Do lists.  There is even an entire section for meal planners, which I used the entire month of January.  And it worked - we tried new recipes and ate at home.  Bonus: Better for the budget than eating out a few times a week!  Also better for the aforementioned thunder thighs and rear-end.

Fitness: The year that I would get back in shape.  That's right. Like Fergie, I'm "workin' on my fitness."  I secretly wanted to be in good enough shape to sign up for something really fun, like the Princess Mini-Marathon, the Nike Women's Marathon, etc.  Something girly and athletic.  Because if you're going to get in shape and run, you might as well wear a pink tutu while doing it, right?!?  I joined the gym in my office building, which was shockingly cheap ($83/3 months), very nice, and empty. I used it 3 times per week.  Up until I was assaulted by a pile of snow...

Decorating: The year I got a lot of projects done at my house.  My laundry room is planned, it only needs to come to fruition.  This will require lots of wrestling with Ikea boxes and cursing at the two-fingered Ikea man. 

 [If you don't understand the Ikea reference, then I'm not sure whether to feel sorry for you for not having an Ikea nearby or to be jealous...]

I also had plans to fix the horrid, decorative drywall in my master bathroom.  

 I'm sure this would look great in plenty of people's homes.  But this is not my style. Fixing this would be followed by floating the drywall, painting, picking out curtains, etc.  Next, paint the master bedroom. And paint about 5 more rooms/pieces of furniture. All of this requires lots of standing, squatting, climbing on ladders, etc.  Ya know, things where the knee is essential.

Like I said, this was going to be THE YEAR OF THE SUZ!!!

And it's all gone to crap.

My goals now look something more like this:

Weight Loss: My diet plan got a mini-jumpstart after not eating for about 36 hours before/after surgery.  Turns out pain meds also take away your appetite, so last week I didn't eat all that much.  This was counteracted, however, by the fact that all I did for a week was sit on a chair and hobble to and from the bathroom. I don't believe many calories are burned by sitting in a chair in a slack-jawed, stone-faced drugged stupor.  Additionally, any weight loss has been gained back in other areas: contraptions (cruches/knee brace), swelling, and Stryker screws.  And now that I can't exercise, I have to eat less. Ugh. The 500-lb fat woman inside of me just starting shedding real tears.

Organization: This has turned into cancelling a lot of things on my calendar.  Followed by adding a ridiculous amount of physical therapy appointments.  And lately, my meal planning has involved responding to text messages from some of the best friends in the world who show up with fabulous food for my family.  No, seriously, we have the best friends in the entire world.  We've actually had to turn people away from bringing us food.  Thanks to all that have taken time out of their days to do this - you're appreciated more than you know!

Fitness: I will actually be getting into shape.  And by getting into shape, that means going to rehab 2-3 times per week and doing leg lifts, leg bends, heel slides, etc.  Not exactly what I had in mind. I suppose my Princess mini will be delayed a year or two...

Decorating: Since all of my projects require dexterity of some kind, I suppose some of the projects will be delayed or outsourced.  I think I just heard Paul say "YES!" from the next room.  WAIT! I can still do some things - I can still curse at the Ikea man.  I mean, seriously, why does he only have two fingers? Was it really too hard for the Swedes to add another 3 fingers to each hand?!?  And why are the Ikea directions SO terrible.  After living with a toddler, I'm fairly certain they hired a 3 year old to draw and write the instructions.

Overall, this year is going to be one giant revision of the original plan.  With lots of asterisks, scribbled notes in the margin, footnotes, and strike-throughs.  But I suppose that's life.

So to counteract all my complaining, I'll at least share a few photos of the cutest little "Irishmen" I know.  Okay, so they're probably not all that Irish. More Scottish, but it's close enough geographically, right?!?

 If you can't tell, Walter wasn't done with his bottle yet.

 No, seriously, give him his bottle before he loses it.

Whew. Daddy finally did some bizarre dance that distracted him for 0.5 seconds for a quick pic.  Just in time for Henry to lose interest and get distracted by the dog.  I don't think I'll ever get another decent picture of them again.  Oh well. Time to go hobble into bed.  At least I'm no longer required to shower with a trash bag covering my left leg. Take that JT - and you thought you brought sexy back.